12 Easy Steps

1. Admit that you have a problem
2. Find a reputable therapist
3. Buy some really cool sunglasses
4. Categorize the world population as "People I can manipulate psychologically" or "People I can intimidate physically" or "My enemies"
5. Manipulate
6. Intimidate
7. Your newest "friends" will increase your ability to manipulate and intimidate your former enemies
8. Repeat steps 4 through 7 until the world is at its knees
9. Declare yourself supreme dictator for life
10. That didn't even take 12 steps...